Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Jolt


Yesterday I had a bit of a jolt. I was digging through my stationary drawer to find a card to mail to my friend when my fingers grabbed hold of several folded up papers. I couldn't remember what it was, so I opened it. Le sigh. It was the emails I had printed out July 24th, 2007. The ones between my husband and the woman he was having an affair with. The ones that had a few pictures of the two of them at a club, dancing and laughing.
Here's the kicker....
They made me sad. They hit me in the gut again. They angered me. But only a very little bit. And only for a short time. I didn't curl up on the floor, crying and clutching at my stomach like I would have a year ago. I didn't doubt myself and my looks/ability to love/years of giving to him/future like I would have a year ago. I didn't start rubbing at my heart and having random attacks of struggling to breathe like I would have a year ago.
My heart is healing.
And my marriage is healing.
And my God is an awesome one.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

wow! you are a strong woman... with a strong God. I'm not sure I would do so well in an affair situation but thankfully it hasn't happened to me. Just stumbled on your blog - I like!

Glitter & Bliss said...

Bless your heart.... I am tearing up. I am so proud of you. What a strong girl you are. God is good... Thanks so much for checking out my blog this morning.
Leslie

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